User Rating:  / 1

Conswayla Bradford

Freshman exploratory major

“This guy was like really obsessed with finger nail polish and toes, so he asked like a bazillion questions about my toenails and how I like to wear them and do I wear rings on them and it was so weird.”

Dan Feist

Sophomore electronic media production major

“I was sitting out on the vent in front of Olson [Hall] and this guy comes up and, all of a sudden, he just starts talking about how he was a painter outside and when it rained he obviously didn’t have a job like, at that point he was called off. So, he said that he would sit at home and just look at magazines and stuff and masturbate like crazy. Like, he said he would masturbate like eight times and sometimes not even producing anything and then his wife would come home and he would get hard all over again and do a ninth time.”

Katie Sapsford

Freshman political science major

“The other day I was in the basement of the Student Center and this guy came up to me and started asking me about what I was watching on my laptop, which was odd because people don’t usually approach people who are obviously busy and so I stopped watching it and we ended up having a conversation briefly about how his name was Vladimir and he was from Russia and he seemed pretty cool. We started talking and he told me about how he’d been to all these fun places and so we decided we were going to hang out again the next day. This was a bit weirder. We were talking about how I was a skier and he said he went snowboarding with his friend one time and his friend decided it would be a good idea to do some marijuana then go off a jump and try to do a really cool trick and so he died and I was like “Oh, that’s really sad.” He said “Yeah, it’s okay though. I still talk to him sometimes.”

Michelle Ireton

Freshman theatre studies major

“This one time last semester me and a couple of my friends were just chilling in the lobby of the Music and Speech Building… and out of nowhere this old man came up to us. He seemed pretty normal, a basic senile old man, so we humored him for a bit and in the middle of the conversation, out of nowhere, he informed us that he owned a whorehouse in Pennsylvania and was inquiring as to whether any of us young ladies were interested in joining. Obviously, we declined and our one male friend that was there was busy stifling his laughter.”

David McAlister

Freshman Communications major

“I’m from Ireland and there was this conversation I had with a guy. He was an alcoholic and he came up to me outside my university. He asked me if I went to the university. I said yeah and he replied “You know, I wouldn’t be an alcoholic, but the only reason why I am is because I’m smart but I lost my glasses and after I lost my glasses, everything went downhill from there. I didn’t have my glasses anymore so I couldn’t read and that’s why I’m not smart.”

Matt Rinear

Sophomore Russian translation major

“Someone was doing a project and they asked me whether or not I peed in the showers and I don’t, but just to be asked that question is kind of awkward.”

Contact Lyndsey Schley at This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it. .